Words from Martha (my dear), on the Bristol test

“She held up a piece of paper, with a telephone number written on it in black ink, large enough for the group of us to see, there were about 7 of us. We put our headphones in our ears, and dialled the number. coque iphone pokemon peluche After the signal problems we were all connected, we could hear each other and each other’s ambient sound. We were sharing each other’s listening. We were invited to drift. coque huawei coque samsung We were told to spread out and wander, told to stay within sight of the large square of grass and listen for instructions. peluche licorne We heard a mans voice telling us that there were, ‘ten people in this square who had not seen their mother for five weeks’, that there were ‘three people who were having a bad day at work’ and so on. As I heard these lines I watched a man in camouflage try to mount a unicycle with the help of a lamppost. I wanted the text to be slower so that I could look at the numbered people. We were then invited to speak when we felt moved to do so. coque huawei No one spoke for a long time. We listened. I listened and wandered. It was damp, damp-cold, cold around the edges. I tried to keep a distance from the other participants, I wondered what to say. I wanted to ask ‘are we alone, are we here alone?’ Am I alone? But I didn’t. I felt the pressure to speak, the rise of a thought, the catch of a breath, the tension towards a sound and then the pause and release again into silence. coque huawei The relief when someone spoke. A female voice drew our attention to a woman with two shopping bags. We watched her from different angles. The first time I spoke I wasn’t sure if it was working because when I spoke I couldn’t hear my own voice through my headphones. coque samsung Could they hear me? Was it working? What I said out loud was not the things that were in my head. One voice began to narrate the journey of another who was following others, following those that seemed ‘not to know this place’, those that seemed to be tourists. This follower commented on his own following. coque samsung We watched the follower following. We all spoke about the wet grass, about the avoidance of the wet, muddy, grass. I watched a girl in plimsolls slide up a grass verge and turned to watch the voice of a woman who was crossing the grass. She said ‘I am crossing the grass’ in answer to another who had said it was ‘too wet to cross the grass’. They asked us how we were feeling, I wanted to say ‘a bit cold’ and then I stopped myself and thought am I really cold? It is more of a damp chill round the edges and then I thought, I wonder if the others are cold and then I thought, its not really cold, I don’t feel really cold and then it was too late to say how I felt and I thought how do I feel and I thought isn’t it odd how I don’t feel more free to speak. coque huawei I wish I felt more comfortable with my voice, I wish I could speak without so much thought. I wanted to say that I wondered how long until the trees would have leaves again, but didn’t. I didn’t because I thought maybe it is obvious, or maybe I should try to work it out. I thought, see how odd the lights on the trees look in the daylight, I wish it was night and I could see them lit up. I heard a voice tell me that two people were waiting for each other outside of the hotel, they didn’t know each other, I could see from afar that one had a green coat. I wanted to go and make them meet somehow. coque huawei Even though I had noticed the church between the shops at the bottom of Park Street many times before I noticed it again when someone noted that they had never noticed it before. Then a voice told us to open the note in our pocket, which we were given at the beginning, it said HANG UP THE CALL. bijoux pas cher I didn’t want to. I didn’t know if they really meant it. I hung up and the sound changed, the space changed, it shrunk, again, back to me, back to only my internal world, only my parameter, only my individual sonic reach. I could only hear the church bells once. No longer doubled through the distance of the network. I was disconnected and I felt a sense of loss. peluche licorne There was somehow more silence and yet at the same time less.